A few weeks ago I had a dead battery. I called AAA, a fabulous man who grew up near my hometown came out, jumped me and cleaned the corosion. I felt it was too expensive to have him replace my battery for $120 when I could go to Wal Mart and get the same battery for $70. Hindsight being 20/20 I would have had my AAA saviour give me the battery.
Over the last few days I've noticed a couple little things, nothing mind blowing, just "huh, that's interesting." So yesterday I called my AAA man and said "hey dude, you said you'd come back and replace my clamp, today good?" He came by, did his thing, and in passing I mentioned my observations. He said, if it ain't broke, don't fix it. OK so today when I was in rush hour traffic in the middle lane of a major intersection and my car wouldn't move...should I think about fixing it? Well, as most single girls my age living out of town the first thing I did was call my Daddy because of course he can do something about it from over 1,000 miles away. When he didn't answer I called my AAA man. Ten minutes later, after three good samaritans pushed my car out of the intersection, my prince in AAA uniform arrived.
Of course the car starts right up for him but then shuts right back down for me. AAA man takes me to the shop where the AAA trucks are maintenanced and tells them to take good care of me...oh great I'm all set, I sit back, get the wireless access code and play on FB...three hours, $275 later, I'm driving down the street to the next not so major intersection where I have deja vu. I walk my fat ass back to the AAA place and they go back and get my car. OK, back to FB. Well an hour and a half later Mr Big Wig AAA man goes for a test drive. 45 min later I'm thinking this is a pretty intense test drive when Mr AAA gopher man comes and says my car broke down, it's at another automotive place he's taking me to it. At this point I'm slightly concerned tell him I need to use the restroom and then I'm ready....Ok I'm done, go to wash my hands and knew it was going to happen, whatched it and couldn't move fast enough oh...oh...faster, grap it...missed. Cell phone in the toilet. Me, the brilliant human being that I am goes and gets it because of course you have to give it to the verizon man when you ask for your replacement because you did have forsight to insure the phone.
I get to the next place who is looking at my car. He says he's keeping the car for a few days....fifteen thoughts go through my head while I, of course, immediately commence hiccupping sobs I try desperatly to hide...in vain of course.
1. I have no phone
2. even if I had a phone who would I call to get me
3. I have no phone
4. I just moved here and have no numbers memorized for people who could even possibly come get me
5. I'm driving to CLT in a couple days
6. I have no phone
7. Where's my Daddy?
8. I just spent $275, how much you going to charge me?
9. How many days till I get to move out of this God-forsaken-hell -hole?
10. how am I getting to Verizon to get my new phone, old one soaking toilet water through my jeans pocket, and then home?
11. When am I going to finally feel like I'm not drowning with no hope of a life jacket?
12. Can my Daddy move to FLA and do this stuff for me?
13. I want to call my Mommy.
14. I have no phone
15. I don't even know where to start
After much deliberation I hack numbers off FB and start tracking down numbers through the assistant's phone who just btw was satan's mistress. My wonderful and amazing new best friend forever drived (ok so I meant drove here, cut me some slack, it's been a bad day) the 30 miles to come get me. 20 miles into this trip I was told problem solved give him 10 minutes. Call friend back, visit Hooters for the first time for a drink...go back just a little happier.
So I get back and he tells me he's charging me $140 which, he says is a great deal and oh, btw, it's all Wal Mart's fault. Apparently when I was saving myself $50 by going to Wal Mart, the lovlies at Wal Mart forgot to connect the battery and computer meaning the computer was running on memory and ran out. They of course took 8 hours to find this because you would never expect such a significant wire to be disconnected. Oh and you have to take the battery and engine apart to see it. Moral of the story: Don't go to Wal Mart, pay the wonderful AAA guy the extra $50, I promise, the following $400 is certainly not worth it.
PS Did you know that when you drop a phone in the toilet they send it in the mail instead of giving it to you? In this day and age of no land lines this can leave a person without communication for an untold period of time....just a thought.
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