Thank God C and R are so down-to-earth. K took a blow to the head Fri afternoon and bled and has these huge swells. She knocked her head trying to pull herself up on a chair. I was just saying the other day what a big girl she is but as I held her screaming and bleeding I felt like I was looking at the six week old I started with and I had personally caused her pain. Three hours later I was with Brian still shaking over it. An hour later Brian and I were breaking up. I don't think either of us planned to do it...it just happened.
Part of me feels so excited that I'm "free"and I can do whatever I want without answering to anyone and all that feminist stuff. The other part of me is totally freaking out and just can't handle it. The emotional pain is so bad it's physical. Two years of my life I have done this and now.....It feels like it was all for nothing. That's not true I have learned so much from him and we've been through a lot together, all of which have been amazing lessons for me. Part of me wants to rip off the band-aid. The other part wants my best friend back. I don't know what is going to happen but I'm sure everything will be ok.
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